Wed, 09 May 2012 22:13:42 -0800WeeblyWed, 09 May 2012 21:03:13 -0800http://www.dublinbellybusters.com/1/post/2012/05/151-may-10th-12-lappin-vs-doke-coward-vs-dreamer.htmlI had an argument with my friend Dara O'Kearney recently. It concerned game selection and it has a sort of place in the 'Coward vs Dreamer' debate (Trademark: Andy Grimason). I insisted that he should be playing the High-Roller at the upcoming Dublin UKIPT in City West. Last season, I played Dublin's High-Roller and he played the Nottingham one but generally, we both take the low variance route, opting for the €300 side event. The reason for this is simple. we are both value hunters and our expectation in a slow structured 150 player+ €300 live event is probably in excess of 100%. Our expectation in a 40 player €1650 event (15 of whom are other pros) is probably 25-30%. Therefore, each tournament is roughly equivalent from a profit standpoint in the long-run. Neither I nor Dara put too much stock in the glamour or kudos of a High-Roller victory so the fact that the €300 has the smaller swings means it gets our vote. Or at least it did.

As of this season, the €1650 buy-in is now €2150. This makes this option the more profitable. A slightly bigger buy-in might mean fewer satellite qualifiers but PokerStars now run online satellites for the event so that should make up for the value shortfall. While the bigger buy-in also generates bigger swings, Dara is rolled for the variance and I... well, I can sell a portion of it and justify it as a 'shot'. From a Kelly Criterion standpoint, I probably wouldn't be breaking the rules by much and despite what people may think about me, I do believe in occasional shot-taking.

Dara mocked me when I told him my thoughts. "You're afraid to play anything over $100 online yet you think playing something like this can be justified". (Yes, even Dara calls me a coward!) In 2010, I played almost 15000 tourneys at an average buy-in online of $81 and I had my biggest year on the cyberfelt. However, with the exception of Sundays, I rarely played anything bigger than the $109 games. Then I took a large portion of 2011 off. I moved a large chunk of my poker earnings into other interests/investments and since returning last December, my average buy-in has been $45. I think that this policy was and still is smart, given my financial status, my initial rustiness and how much the game evolves in a 6-month period. I'm in the process of rebuilding my poker-roll and my conservative step-by-step formula has worked out well for me thus far. So I slept on it and realised my friend was probably right.

The next night, I texted Dara on Skype and was about to tell him that I had come round to his rationale. Before, I had the chance, however, he told me that he had slept on it and now believed I was right. And, well... I enjoyed hearing that too much to tell him what I was about to say. It would seem sleeping makes Doke more of a dreamer (and me more of a coward)!

]]>Sat, 21 Apr 2012 13:19:23 -0800http://www.dublinbellybusters.com/1/post/2012/04/150-april-21st-12-i-got-the-moves-like-jaka.htmlI've been playing on the live Irish circuit for about a year now. For the first 6 months, I enjoyed the anonymity of not being known by anyone at my table but these days, I am a familiar face and, well, an even more familiar voice. During the Irish Open, Daragh Davey told me that he could make a pretty accurate guess as to how many chips I had from the other side of a poker room just from how loudly and how much I was speaking.

I think the equation goes something like this:   

decibels X words per min + # of times clock I have called the clock = # of BBs
        deep breaths             number of tweets about hating live poker

So, suffice to say, I get asked a lot about my table talk.

The truth is I am a naturally outgoing person and compulsive chatterbox. I find live poker pretty dull so it makes the entire experience more enjoyable if I try to make friends and get to know my table-mates. Does it also give me an advantage? I think so. However, some of my fellow-pros disagree. Padraig O'Neill recently questioned me on a conversation I started at the table about Sharkscope. He said mentioning this immediately gave away the information that I was an online player. Of course, he is correct but I don't think it matters that you give away information as long as you are in control of the information you give away. All I merely did in this instance was introduce the possibility of a leveling war with some of my table-mates and I am the best Roshambo player I know.

I am really strong in the fundamentals of poker and for the most part, my edge exists there. The thing about live poker, though, is that there are loads of other edges. One of them is in diverging from optimal strategy versus certain types of weak opponents that are more numerous and more easily identified in a mid-stakes live setting. There are a dozen guys who are regulars in Irish casinos who are absolutely horrendous when it comes to the abc of poker strategy yet they make money year in, year out. I've sat opposite them and watched them make horrific errors (and they are errors) with a short stack but they get away with it. Why? Because it is fine to play exploitably if it isn't in the arsenal of your opponent to exploit you.

I also believe there is an enormous edge to be found by pushing people's buttons and getting them out of their comfort zone. If I can get a nitty player to play back at me with a wide range then I have a huge advantage because he doesn't have the same experience as me at navigating the waters of post-flop play without a premium hand. I will have a greater understanding of the ranges he and I can represent and it will be far more likely that he will slip up when telling a consistent story over multiple streets.

There is also a ton of value in inducing bluffs from the looser guys who want to knock you off your perch as table captain. At the UKIPT in Nottingham, I donk-bet the turn on a 258-5 board after the flop went check-check. The river came a 9 and before checking, I told the villain that I had 44 and I knew it was good so his only way to win was bluff with his ace-high. I checked, he overbet the pot and I snapped. He showed ace-high and I showed him 44.

I am still learning the tricks of the 'live pro' but to quote the flamboyant Faraz Jaka who is a polarising figure in the poker community, "Live poker is a hustle to me and playing it, I have learned a lot about people and their psychology... how people react to things, how they respond to me". I think this is very true. Faraz is a master of table-talk and provocation. He bosses his table and puts his opponents off kilter. Relentlessly attacking them on all fronts, he play's Jedi mind games, then he 3-bets them and even if they successfully tune him out with their I-Pod and headphones, they still have to contend with his bedazzling rings and Sideshow-Bob hair.

]]>Tue, 17 Apr 2012 18:12:12 -0800http://www.dublinbellybusters.com/1/post/2012/04/149-april-17th-12-sent-to-nottingham.htmlDuring the English Civil War, captured Royalist troops were 'Sent to Coventry' where they were ostrocised by the locals. This was regarded as a particularly cruel form of punishment, unless of course you were already from Coventry in which case I assume you were sent to Nottingham.

The most recent stop on the UKIPT was at the famous Dusk Till Dawn venue. Situated in an industrial estate beside the motorway on the outskirts of Nottingham city, The DTD is considered one of England's premiere poker rooms/warehouses. Normally adept and innovative on the organisational front, Pokerstars have a great track record with their live events. Unfortunately, last weekend was the exception to the rule.

The system for registering was idiotic, that is, if you managed to register at all. The physical schedule provided different information to the online schedule which was also different from what was displayed on the screens within the venue. Then, when you did finally register, you were placed on the same table as your 4 friends who were before and after you in the queue. Breaks were taken when they weren't scheduled and scheduled breaks were disregarded and played through. Many of the dealers were unfamiliar with the game and aside from lacking the dexterity to actually flop a flop, they were incapable of calculating a sidepot or awarding the pot to the correct player.

And then there was the hotel...

Adorning the stairwell of the Park Plaza Hotel Nottingham is an enormous safety net. I can only assume that previous residents of this crappy accommodation felt the same way I did about their stay, except they actually had the balls to throw themselves over the bannisters rather than spend another minute there.

The bedrooms were awful. The £5 per day internet charge was a disgrace. Only one plug socket in the room worked. The TV was smaller than an i-pad and the bed had the firmness of a child's trampoline. The breakfast buffet was repulsive and eating from it easily represented my biggest gamble of the weekend. It boasted such delicacies as cardboard-ified eggs, stewed beans and rashers that possessed a colour and consistency that would turn the stomach of even the hardiest of breakfast-rollers. All in all, I have nothing positive to say other than I am positive I will never go back to Nottingham, a charmless industrial hell-hole devoid of culture, colour or places of interest. I sincerely hope the UKIPT and Pokerstars seriously consider dropping it from their otherwise excellent tour.

]]>Fri, 06 Apr 2012 03:00:17 -0800http://www.dublinbellybusters.com/1/post/2012/04/148-march-6th-12-run-good-friday.htmlIt's Easter weekend here in Dublin which can mean only one thing: Irish Open Main Event Day. Like me, you might not be a believer but this religious festival means that once a year, Irish degenerates are given the unique opportunity to play poker over a four day weekend. I for one am grateful to Jesus for that.

Good luck to anyone taking part in the madness! May your stacks rise again (according to the scriptures).

]]>Tue, 03 Apr 2012 18:14:30 -0800http://www.dublinbellybusters.com/1/post/2012/04/147-march-4th-12-no-pancakes-but-plenty-of-bacon.htmlTricked by my friend and Irish Eyes Team Captain Dara O'Kearney, I attended my first ever EMOP last week. I can't tell you how disappointed I was to find that we weren't going to the European Mansion of Pancakes ('Euro-IHOP'). Turns out the EMOP was just some poker tournament in Lisbon. A 10am flight on Wednesday meant caffeine replaced sleep for the poker vampires as we made our way to the exclusive little town of Estoril (the Dalkey of Lisbon) via aircoach, plane and the €80 taxi-ride of a local hustler. We checked in and then ventured out to a local sushi restaurant and then onto pub where we played pool and drank mojitos. My original plan was to hustle Dara who is both unco-ordinated and colour-blind but that was put on hold when Irish poker players Gary Clarke and Kevin Spillane walked through the door. A very accomplished pool player, Kevin threw down the gauntlet for a 'Best of 9' Team Challenge Match. Dara and I were paired together and after falling 4-2 behind, we clawed it back to win 5-4.

On Thursday, we played Day 1A. The field was pretty soft so I set about playing ultra loose. My new policy in the early stages of MTTs is to leave my i-pod and headphones in the bag and really get studying each and every player at the table. I am gaining a new respect for the 'live' elements (although I still think their importance is generally overstated) and I think it pays dividends to remain fully engaged with the game and its shifting dynamics.

Plenty of aggression, a few high-wire bluffs, a couple of sick calls (one of which can be read in this week's strategy section of Dara's 'Letter From Doke') and one huge double-up with a flopped set versus Nuno Capucho (not the footballer) meant that I ended the day as chip-leader with 179K. Dara ended with 90K, good for 10th place with 78 remaining.

Despite an early set-back on Day 2, I rebounded well to chip up to 320k come bubble time. I had everyone at my table covered so with 32 remaining and 27 getting paid, I opened up completely and was met with no resistance. Over the course of 80 minutes, I opened 22 of 26 hands, winning 21 of them, building up to 530K by the time the bubble burst. We played down to 13 and when it was time to bag up, I had 690K and was sitting 2nd in chips. Unfortunately, Dara had one of those days when nothing worked and he eventually went out in about 45th place.

Day 3 was fast and furious as the tournament became a bit of a turbo. 13 became 9 in 16 minutes and it was suddenly final table time. I was still 2nd in chips with just under a million after I got mixed up in a three-way pre-flop all-in with AA vs A2 and 77. The board played out K74-9-A and even I afforded myself a 'BOOM' as the river 'one-outer' was dealt.

Play was cagey at the final table and as the short-stacks survived their double-ups, the spread of chips became more even. I lost my first skirmish but remained reasonably loose, opening a bunch of pots and 3-betting the guys in 2nd and 3rd whenever I had a legit spot. This allowed me to chip up to 1.2 million without showdown over the course of the first hour. By the time the dinner break came, we were down to 6, the shorties having finally succumbed. One shorty remained in the dangerous shape of Tomi Huuskonen from Finland and on our return, he went on a heater, going from 2.5bbs to 30bbs and the chiplead over the course of a single orbit. We lost another player and then it was the turn of fellow-Fin and recently signed I-GAME pro Joni Jouhkimainen to get the rub of the green. Unfortunately, it was to be at my expense.

Looking down at JJ on the button, I min-raised to 80K, he reshipped his 13bbs from the Big Blind and I snap-called. He showed pocket 8s and I was 84% to win a pot that would give me 40% of the chips at the table. The flop came A74, providing no backdoor possibilities for Joni. I was 93% but alas, an 8 on the turn and a blank river meant I was crippled. A few hands later Joni 4bet shoved A10 for 19 bbs and was called by the AJ of chipleader Martin Dahlqvist of Sweden. Joni turned a 4-flush and suddenly Martin found himself on the short-stack. Martin and I took turns to shove, keeping our stacks afloat but the situation was becoming perilous for both of us.

With the button, Martin shoved for 4BBs. I looked down at A6s and figuring he was shoving almost any two, this was an obvious +EV spot and an opportunity to knock out a player and ladder in the process. I shoved 5BBs from the SB but when Patric Mattsson (also of Sweden) in the BB over-called, I knew I was in trouble. Martin flipped up 78 but Patric showed 1010. The flop came J78 and Martin let out a roar. This was as bad as it could get for me. If Martin held, I would be eliminated in 5th. An ace would win me a tiny side pot and I needed runner-runner to win the main pot. The turn brought a glimmer of hope in the form of a 4. The four 5s in the deck would win it for me but any J, 10, 9 or 4 would give me the consolation of a money jump.

The river came a 10 and both Martin and I were eliminated. The 4th place finish bagged me a little under €14K and I celebrated/drowned my sorrows Cuban-style with several mojitos and a nice Cohiba. Dara was in the process of coming 2nd in the PLO side event so I stuck around the casino to rail him (and help him with some short-stack PLO strategy), mingling with the lovely and hospitable people from I-GAME, in particular their charming VIP co-ordinator (and semi-retired top poker-pro) Johanna Pyysing. Joni went on to win the tournament, eventually beating Tomi after a lengthy heads-up battle. Really nice guys with big futures, they represent a new crop of talented youngsters coming up through the ranks of Finnish poker.

It would be a lie to say I'm not a bit disappointed with the result but overall, I'm very satisfied with how I played. There are a lot of live tourneys on the horizon (Irish Open, Nottingham UKIPT, Bulgaria EMOP, Dublin UKIPT) and while I still consider myself an online player, I guess these occasional appearances on the live circuit do break up the ennui of a life spent pushing buttons. Lisbon may not have delivered any pancakes but €14K was a nice bit of bacon!

]]>Mon, 26 Mar 2012 12:28:19 -0800http://www.dublinbellybusters.com/1/post/2012/03/146-march-26th-12-a-smrgsbord-of-humanity.htmlCitywest boasted the weirdest eclectic mix of people this weekend. A 'Monster' Dirt-Bike Rally drew a toothless, leather-clad neo-heavy metal element. An Irish Dancing Competition meant that every hallway and corridor was occupied with hundreds of heavily hair-sprayed, orange crayon coloured, (probably vajazzled) 'Toddlers in Tiaras' doing their jigs and reels. And then, of course, there was the blonde-haired, blue-eyed, chiseled jawed, 'Beats by Dr Dre'-wearing, Norwegian Poker degen fraternity who had made their annual trip away from home for their National Championships. 

I spent the weekend with this smörgåsbord of humanity, playing the €750 JP Poker Masters on Friday (and briefly on Saturday) and the €300 side event on Saturday evening. The JP Masters boasted the toughest small field I have seen in Ireland. My first table played 4-handed for the first hour, forcing Mick Graydon, Feargal Nealon and I to swarm around veteran Mick McCloskey who, with his 67 career cashes (the most recent being his Western Open runner-up finish three weeks ago), was the obvious soft spot. I survived the day but busted early on Day 2, succumbing to a rampant Thomas 'SuperBomberMan' Nolan.

I jumped into the side game late and quickly got busy amassing a chiplead. Some flips before the final table didn't go my way so I had just over average for the final table. I eventually finished 5th which would be super except it only paid 4. My friends Dara O'Kearney and Daragh Davey made the money, the former taking down the event after a huge comeback heads-up. I was obviously disappointed to bubble but it's more important to me that I played well. 

My salesmanship on the live felt has improved enormously in the past year, evidenced by a greater number of my bluffs getting through and a greater number of calls when I have the goods. It's such a fascinating variant that is singularly a 'live' thing. It's also so individual to the villain. For example, I know that in certain spots Dara O'Kearney is sitting across the table knowing that I don't have it but the presentation I have delivered isn't for him - it's for my opponent who I'm confident will buy my story. On the flip-side, I have been making a point to randomise my play and take funkier lines versus the other pros. That's a dangerous game as any divergence from optimal strategy versus good players can be spewy but longterm, I think it is vital to be unpredictable if you want to win the leveling battle.

The Norwegian Poker Championships continue all this week with about four tourneys each day. Daragh Davey binked the €120 with €50 rebuys last night for a tidy score but the real sicko action will be at the cash tables upon which literally millions of euro will exchange hands. If you want a slice of the action, get yourself down to Citywest and duke it out with the loosest players in Ireland or as the Norwegians refer to them "a bunch of nitty Irish cowards!"


]]>Mon, 05 Mar 2012 21:52:00 -0800http://www.dublinbellybusters.com/1/post/2012/03/145-march-5th-12-rock-maniac-donk.htmlThere is a phenomenon within the poker community whereby the loose players call the tight players 'rocks' and 'nits'. In retaliation, the tight players call the loose players 'maniacs' and 'spew-monkeys'. It used to be a complement to be called a rock but within the modern poker paradigm these days, it is more of an insult.

In the complex game of ‘Rock, Paper, Scissors’ (or ‘Rock, Maniac, Donk’) that is poker, the rocks are probably best at exploiting the deficiencies of the weak passive players, the maniacs are best at exploiting the tightness of the rocks and if you want to exploit the looseness of the maniacs, you either have to become more maniacal than them or adopt a style that’s even tighter than the rock (become a nit!). The latter strategy generally bothers the maniac as it turns him into a spew-monkey. Of course, it isn’t quite as simple as this. There is far more subtlety and nuance to poker and the best players are chameleons, capable of playing all styles, making timely gear-changes and adjusting to game-flow.

Recently, however, I have noticed another layer to these exchanges. I have heard one or two loose players refer to the nittier guys as 'cowards'. I, too, have been accused of cowardice for my generally risk-averse nature. It is an interesting choice of word. ‘Coward’ carries allusions to fear and the desire to be non-confrontational. But nits aren't afraid. Rather, they are cautious. They aren’t non-confrontational either. They are just selectively confrontational. As my friend and self-confessed nit, Padraig ‘Smidge’ O'Neill said recently to a loose player who was jibing him about always having ‘it’ and one day getting called by him when he doesn’t have ‘it’: “I’ll probably have it that time too”.

I find it interesting too that, in my experience, some of the guys who like to indulge in this type of name-calling are staked players. They are also guys who live at home, come from affluent backgrounds and/or have no dependents. Poker is a different animal when it’s your own money on the line and you do it to pay your mortgage and put your kids through school. Face that challenge, staring into that particular abyss and I challenge those same people to play with the same reckless abandon.

Some players have the stomach for big swings and some players take the lower variance route. The former generally come to the game with an appetite for risk and a need to gamble that can be satiated by poker. The latter generally come to the game with a fiscally conservative businessman’s outlook – they don’t fear risk but they prefer to manage it, like an actuary. They realise that playing cautiously is not dumb. It’s what separates a lot of good poker players from professional poker players. Managing oneself and one’s bankroll is more important than playing the cards if you want to have longevity in this industry.

Don’t get me wrong, I do admire the more fearless guys who take bigger risks than I am willing to take. I salute their courage when they take a shot in a game that’s bigger than they can afford to lose. I celebrate their victory in the ‘Big One’. But I have also staked and bailed out some of those same guys when they went busto for living and dying by that same sword.

Poker attracts people who want to get rich fast. Poker attracts people who aren’t willing to work hard. For those people, there will always be bad role-models - outliers who succeeded in a short space of time with little effort. I prefer to look at the guys who take the financial lessons of the real world and apply them to poker, who set realistic targets and then execute a specific plan with discipline in order to achieve those targets. They are the guys who grind every day, 50 hours a week for years, building up their bankrolls. No short-cuts. No half-measures. Just old-fashioned elbow grease. Within that schema, no one event is allowed to have significant enough negative impact so as to knock you off your ultimate course.

To paraphrase a line from my good friend Jono Crute when describing his hero, newly crowned EPT Champion Mickey ‘mement_mori’ Peterson: “I wanna be that guy. He is the guy who would be just as successful in all the parallel universes”.


]]>Mon, 27 Feb 2012 19:18:33 -0800http://www.dublinbellybusters.com/1/post/2012/02/144-february-27th-12-best-in-the-business.htmlThe Saturday before last, as I was railing my friends Dara O’Kearney and Padraig ‘Smidge’ O’Neill, (as they skillfully came 13th and 14th respectively in a UKIPT turbo side-event that paid 12,) an argument was breaking out between Tournament Director JP McCann and a player who had just been eliminated from the tourney. Of course, being the busy-body that I am, I was curious to know what it was about.

The player had received a one orbit penalty for failure to take his seat at his new table immediately. According to the other players at the table, he missed 3 hands while he was away, giving him and his short stack an obvious advantage as they approached the bubble. JP made the ruling that he would have to sit out for one orbit and as a consequence, he returned to his seat 15 minutes later to find he had been blinded and anted down to a stack of just two big blinds. A few moments later, he was eliminated in 15th place and he immediately began protesting the one orbit penalty, saying it was too harsh a punishment for what he had done. He accepted that he had broken the rules but believed, as did several of his table-mates, that such an offense warranted a more lenient response. He marched away from the tournament area but returned a few minutes later, armed with some new information that he believed proved that an injustice had occurred.

The player in question bee-lined straight for JP and cited the tournament rule that failure to move to your new table promptly should incur a two hand penalty. As the dispute got more and more heated, JP did the appropriate thing and took the player off to the side, away from the playing area. He was causing a scene and was becoming a distraction for the players who were now navigating the bubble. JP explained to him that the reason he decided on a one orbit penalty was because he had chosen a compromise between the two rules that the player had broken. You see, he had actually left the tournament area with his chips while he was meant to be moving tables and as a consequence of that action should have been immediately disqualified from the tournament. Instead of taking that rather drastic action, JP used his discretion and opted for what I believe was a fair and appropriate response to the player’s clear angle-shoot.

I know that, in the end, the player did not agree with the ruling handed out, nor did many of the spectators gathered but I would like to go on record as saying that I think it is pressurised moments like this that define the quality of a TD and I think JP, with poise and sound judgement, demonstrated why he is one of the best in the business.


]]>Thu, 23 Feb 2012 07:29:00 -0800http://www.dublinbellybusters.com/1/post/2012/02/143-february-23rd-12-galway-ukipt-review-part-iii-aka-clock-tourettes.htmlBy the second break of Day 2, I had built up a 140K stack with the blinds at 800/1600. My image was pretty terrible though as I had run and shown several bluffs. I had flatted from the SB with K10s and then 4bet shoved when I sensed the BB’s 3bet was light. I had also shipped a King high flush draw on a Jx-6s-7s board after a bet and a raise, getting the ace high flush draw and AJ to fold. My image was so bad, in fact, that I got 10J to 4bet shove his 27bb stack into my QQ. The ladies held and I had 180K. Disaster was, however, lurking just around the corner.

I opened AKs from EP, was flatted by the button and the BB put in the squeeze. I put in the 4th bet, hoping to induce a light shove. The shove came but the villain had pocket Kings which held for a humungous pot that would have given me a massive chip-lead. Losing that cooler meant I was back to an average stack and I was eventually eliminated in 104th (81 got paid) when I 3bet shoved A4s after a button raise only for him to have woken up with QQ. It was the right move at the wrong time and I left the hotel to lick my wounds over a pint with Jono 'GAWA9' Krute who was weirdly delighted that his elimination from the tournament had been at the hands of his idol Mickey 'mement_mori' Peterson.

I got back to the hotel just as the bubble was bursting and was happy to see that my friend Nick Newport had snuck his way to the min-cash despite rocking a shorty. Nick is a very talented cash-game and tournament player and he was particularly generous to me over the weekend, offering me the spare bed in his room after I moaned about the snoring of one Mick McCloskey with whom I had been sharing.

I late registered for the $300 side event and within minutes made a target of myself. Two players were taking it upon themselves to deconstruct every hand at the table. They thought they were being clever, using all the poker lingo but their comments ranged from the blatantly obvious to the downright ignorant. Eventually, I had enough. I looked at the dealer and said “I thought it was English only at the table”. She looked at me curiously – “They are speaking English”. “Are they?...”, I said, “Coz I’m pretty sure they’re speaking donkey”.

Ten minutes later, I flatted my BB with A10c after a CO raise and a Button call. The flop came Kc-7x-3c and I check-called the Button’s half-pot bet. The CO went away and the turn came the 9c. I donk-lead for 900 into a 3K pot. The button called. The river came a red 4 and I tank-shoved 8800 into a 4800 pot. He looked at me puzzled as I did my best Patrick Antonius impersonation (People often mix us up!). I remained dead still for about 2 minutes and I could see that my polarizing bet confused him. The break was called and my friend Dara O’Kearney was hovering behind me, having come over from an adjacent table. Players from our table were getting up and I looked at the dealer – “CLOCK”. She called for the floor and he snap-called, slamming his chips over the line. I turned over the nuts and he left the table in disgust.

I turned around to see Dara laughing – “I can’t believe you called Time on someone again”. “I know”, I said, “I think I might have developed Clock-Tourettes”.

]]>Wed, 22 Feb 2012 04:17:50 -0800http://www.dublinbellybusters.com/1/post/2012/02/143-february-22nd-12-galway-ukipt-review-part-ii-aka-the-hag.htmlSaturday was Day 2 of the Main Event and things started weirdly for me as I attempted to trap with Aces, flatting my button to a loose player's cut-off raise with two maniacs behind me. The BB tanked but unfortunately just flatted. The K-J-10 rainbow board was about as gross as possible and I checked with both players checking behind. The turn brought a 9 and I check folded to the original raiser's bet. He showed QQ so I guess it was the opposite of a bad beat. If I had played the hand any other way, I would have been eliminated for sure.

That table broke and I was moved to a much softer, more passive table. The only downside to this move was the presence of a vile Canadian woman who I named 'The Hag' on twitter (it seems to have stuck as it was repeated by several other players including Phil Baker who also had the misfortune of being seated next to her over the weekend). She was being loud and generally obnoxious to the men at her table, making crass remarks and picking particularly on a 19 year old guy to my left. She kept asking him whether he had a girlfriend and what their favourite sexual positions were. When he ignored her, she asked him if he still lived at home and if his Mom cleaned his underwear.

The Hag got embroiled in a pot where she c-bet the flop. Her opponent moved his front stack forward without speaking and then did the same thing with the stack behind it. She instantly jumped down his throat for a string bet. The dealer acknowledged that it was indeed a string bet and she called for the floor. This would all be fine except for the fact that his front stack had 45K and the back one was his ante chips totaling about 600. In other words, it was effectively the same bet she faced either way. Her opponent offered to take the stack back but she demanded the floor, insisting "rules are rules".

I implored her to be rational - "What's the difference, he's putting you all-in either way". "I want the floor", she argued, to which I responded "You're wasting time! He said he’d take the stack back. There’s no need for the floor because there is no dispute". The floor came, told her opponent to take back the second stack and she was faced with a bet of 45k and not 45,600. She tanked for about a minute, at which point I looked at the tournament director who was still hovering over the table - "Since you're here... TIME". He told her that she had a minute to act and she snarled at me - "I can't believe you did that. You're not even in the hand". "You made us all part of this hand", I answered. She folded angrily and I told her that she was some piece of work. She told me that I wasn't a very nice man. 

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