DUBLIN BELLYBUSTERS

It is my intention to write a series of blog entries, cataloging my live poker experiences. The focus of this series will be the futility of live poker as an endeavor and the experience of ennui it induces in me.

Case Study: The Elks Club, Windsor, November 18th, 2008.
 - $25 buy-in
 - 60 players
 - 2000 chips
 - Level 1: 25/50
 - Blinds double every 15 minutes

The place smelled like the dead carcass of an elderly chain-smoking homeless man. The cards and chips were sticky to the touch. The players were a random collection of vested tattooed skin-heads... and that was just the women. The standard of play was the worst I have ever encountered but the ridiculous blind levels effectively equalised the field and made it a donkfest. I made the Final Table without picking up a single hand all night but I would put credit that more to the horribleness of my opponents than to any skills that I demonstrated.

The following two hands were the first two of the Final Table and I can safely say are the funniest I have ever witnessed:

HAND 1
The blinds were 1K/2K and the average chip-stack was 12K. UTG (with 13K) limps. UTG+1 (with 9K) limps. Folded around to the button (with 10K) who limps. Small Blind (with 15K) min-raises to 4K. Everyone (Yes, EVERYONE!!!) folds.

HAND 2
UTG (with 7K) limps. UTG+2 (with 11K) limps. Cut-Off (with 8K) min-raises for half his stack to 4K. Small Blind folds. Big Blind (with 11K) calls. UTG folds (my jaw is on the ground!!!) UTG+2 calls. Pot is 15K. The flop comes 9-7-3. Big Blind leads out for 2K (yes 2K into a 15K pot). UTG+2 folds. Cut-Off with only 4K left in his stack and a 17K pot out there goes into the tank and eventually folds, showing pocket 8s!!!! My eyes literally pop out of my skull. The BB rakes in the 17K pot, showing pocket 4s. The dejected player in the Cut-Off mutters nice hand and explains to the table that he put him on Jacks (Yeah, like Jacks wouldn't have shipped it in pre-flop!!!).

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